.....not really! i guess we do have some type of connection that ties us... this will be our third time dealing with each other....hip hop has a family as do i. His significant other knows all about me and i know all about her....as my other knows about hip hop and hip hop knows about him. hip hop and i went hiatus with our others for a while...me for about 6 months and him for about 3 months. in that time we enjoyed each other's company....hip hop has other "dimes and lovelies" as he calls them and they are furious that he spends his free time with me....i can't control what he chooses to do although i am glad he choose me, his mum-mum or his chocolate...
well about a week ago, Sunday May 5th, hip hop stated that he was going to try to make it work with his children's mother. We agreed that if either went back we would not mess with each other because of the connection we have mentally and physically. So we parted ways.......for one damn day....Monday night he was texting me and i was loving every minute of it.....and now hip hop is back....
i know that i am wrong for messing with this man while he is suppose to be tryna make it work but she acting like she don't want him and if she don't i damn sure do....some one's trash is always someone else's treasure....
the only reason so far that they can not work is because of me, she knows about our history from the beginning as she was a mutual friend of ours...she knew how he felt about me before they ever started dating....we never made it because i was young he was young and we were into different things and then did not understand what our feelings were....so now we are back at it again and she is upset....
so what do i do, do i be a woman and step back and let her have the man that i want, that i had first or do i continue to do what i am doing and either end up hurt because he may choose her over me or he could love me and i love him like no other....
the physical is OFF-THE-HOOK, the BEST sex of my life!!!!!!! the comfortability that i have with him, the respect he has for my body, the chemistry, the power, the connection is like WHOA!!!!!! it is mind blowing sex!!!!! again the physical is MAGNIFICENT!!!!!!!!!
i love him dearly and i want him to be happy as he feels the same about me...i don't want my significant other back and it has nothing to do with hip hop----a whole nother set of issues---trust me.!!! any ways, he wants to try to make it work with his children's mother because they have children together and he wants them to be brought up together and just wants to try make her happy because he can admit that he did not give her his all, he claims he owes her that....
i listen but a part of me is like this nucca is bullshitin' me and i want to bounce, walk away, but what if???? what if he chooses me, what if he doesn't, what if i am the one, what if he is the one...what if i am the one?????? there are too many what if's and i am not ready to let go.....but i know that i am wrong to an extent....
i want him and i am not ready to let go...........i guess hip hop is not gone, not yet anyway!!!!!!!!
...............karma is a bitch!!!!!!!!!!!!
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