Hip Hop is Gone!!!

.....and i feel like i have lost my very best friend in the world....actually i did lose my very best friend in the world (as a male). Not only did we have a relationship we also had a friendship, a friendship that our significant others may never understand. When i needed him the most he was there and when he needed me the most i was there.

there are some things that you do in life that requires "the need" and there are others that you do because you want to. He needed to be with his family because they needed him and i needed to be with my family because they needed me. We agreed, in the very beginning ,that when and if it was time to return "home" we would discuss it....and do that just that....we would let each other know, and not hear if from the streets....and he did just that...

Sunday the day came, he kept his promise to me which made me respect our friendship even more. He and i were honest from day one and we stayed that way all the way to the end... there is no bitterness, no hatred, no anger just more love for him than he will ever know....

I know i was special in his life, although he said it, he never had to because i knew!!! I knew we had something that no one would ever understand....He is good guy and he wants to give his future a chance. He knew he did not give his all to his family when they needed him the most so he walked a way and when he walked away he met me. The funny thing was, he was doing what my ex did and when i explained it to him and broke it down for him he understood and i told him to be patience, persistent and give her space and she will come around......and she did!!!

i don't regret giving the advice because i would have given the same advice if it where one of my girlfriends.....I want him to be happy!!!

I miss him already, he was constant and consistent in my life for these last 3 months and when you get use to a person and no longer get that or know that you will no longer get that the reality of it all will hit you harder than a brick.

yes, i shed tears, but not for hurt, nor anger but because my friend is gone....I will miss him...

This was our last go at it and i did not want to overstep my bounds, but i do wish i would have said i too loved him.....although that is something that doesn't have to be said because we both knew we loved each other....an unspoken love, a magical love, real love.....just at the wrong time...

We shared our first last kiss yesterday. The sparks and the chemistry was still there and will forever be, i met my soul mate but a day late and a dollar short....

Love?!?!?!?!?!?.........My Hip Hop is Gone!